Spaghetti

My head is always full of things that I want to achieve or that I want to get done in a short period of time. I want to change who I am. I'm being realistic as I can imagine it won't work out the way I expect it to be, but I think it is possible to change yourself, not only your habits but who you are from inside.

I'm acting shy in front of others, and I've been struggling with this all my life, but now I'm starting to get fears again too. I would just really like to change this aspect of my behavior.
I've bought a book about being shy and introversion and I hope this will be something that can help me overcome that.

Another aspect of who I am is that I'm so easily distracted and this bothers me a lot because I am very clumsy and I tend to mess things up really really bad. I'm still looking for something that could help me maintain my focus.

I'm also a very serious person, always thinking and full of doubts and what ifs. I feel like other people want to pull my leg all the time because I react in a way that is somehow sincere. I feel very uncomfortable when people treat me like that, even when they only try to make me feel comfortable and try to make me talk more or something, I'm not sure.

These are, I think, the aspects of my personality that I worry about most. They may be negative, but I think I have to use these aspects in a positive way. I think it might be possible, because this personality is not by definition one big mistake.

I know this blog is very serious and self-centered, I'm sorry if you don't like it, I just want to get things straight in my mind.